I responded to a post on MaxFisch recently on this subject, and I’ve got quite an opinion on what the original poster asked so I’m reposting the thread here.
What do you think about his questions?
VegasRed: An article for discussion …
Would a more complete sexual education including sadomasochism made a difference in the quality of your adult life ?
In general would society benafit from a more elaborate sexual education in the teen age years ?
Mme Sade: I’m sure I will amend after I’ve read the article as it will no doubt be thought provoking, but my first response to your questions are no, and compared to what I got- without a doubt.
I don’t think schools should be teaching children about specific sexuality choices so much as an openness to their existence and practice. They should teach them, explicitly, about safe sex practices, sexual health and hygiene, the emotional maturity of sex, family planning and reproduction, the power of choice, rape, sexual harassment, respect, dating expectations, and maybe even how to recognize signs of sexual predators.
A sexually responsible child and young adult is a well informed one. I am not expert enough in child psychology to state as to whether being better educated would increase or decrease any young adult sexuality statistics. I know that the internet is never going to child-proof the search engines and no one inherently knows every question they should be asking one.
Just as much as boys need someone to tell them how to flirt, what makes a good date, and how to communicate desires with a girl; girls need someone to tell them they can say no, how to recognize they may be in danger (drunk without a guardian angel at some party perhaps and the date is coming on too strong), what is inappropriate flirting and behavior from a co-worker or boss (I’ve been sexually harassed by 7 out of 10 bosses and in every single work place I’ve ever been in. It took me a few jobs to figure out what exactly was bothering me so bad to leave a job I liked), and to tell her that she can be sexually active without being ashamed.
I think the students should believe with all their heart that they can ask their sex-ed teacher about anything they want. I think the sex-ed teacher should be supportive of them learning about whatever they’re sexualizing (homosexuality, transgenderism, BDSM, whathaveyou), or helping them to find the appropriate counselor to guide them.
I think the boys should be encouraged to carry condoms at all times to develop good habits (whether they or their friends may need it at an urgent moment).
I think sex ed should start the year before puberty generally takes place, and the content should grow with the students every year until graduation.
I think the students should have free access to contraceptives and information packets that are located in discreet places.
My mandatory sex-ed class my sophomore year didn’t answer a single question I had about safe sex, family planning, or emotional sexual relationships. The teacher was one of the sports coaches I didn’t know, and she didn’t exactly make me feel like I could ask her anything she would know or approve of. The safe sex class was one day, and it terrified us. Sex was described as a sin as we were forced to memorize all kinds of incurable and easily contractable venereal diseases. All my sex advise came from my more promiscuous friends (most of whom ended up pregnant before graduation or soon after). I was sexually active with my high school sweetheart my last two years, and it wasn’t until after graduation that I learned it was possible to have a latex allergy and there were even special condoms for people like me. All we learned about was abstinence, latex condoms, and oral contraceptives. No sponges, no spermicides, no diaphragms, no cervical cups, no IUD’s, no female condoms, no rhythm cycle. I suffered painful burning after almost every sexual experience for two years because they left me ignorant.
Look at me now. I’m a lucky one.
Monday, August 9, 2010