Mistress Sade

If you’re looking for a lifestyle relationship, how do you approach a professional? Successfully?

While talking with my slave tonight (after listening to the latest  Masocast with Scarlett) we were discussing why he had never seen a pro when he had been unsuccessful in the lifestyle scene. Several people had suggested to him “courting” a professional, and I admit I was instantly turned off at the suggestion (probably because I’ve come across so many selfish and delusional douche bags that way).

He felt it would have been dishonest as

a.         he couldn’t really afford it

b.         he had no way of telling if she was single, looking for a personal, etc.

c.         he had no way of knowing how long to ‘give’ each professional relationship before confessing he’s only interested in a personal relationship or moving on

Which got me thinking about how someone might be upfront from the beginning without being off-putting. There are countless Pro’s who live the lifestyle, so how does one approach them?

All of my slaves have been collared because I wanted to own them. Some were clients; some were met through friends or at parties. I’ve never gone farther than a training collar with a client who approached me for personal servitude, greatly in part because their idea of servitude did not match mine.

So when picking my own brain (because surely there must be a way to do it) I asked myself these questions and had these thoughts-

Depending on the stage I am at in my life I may or may not be open to taking on a new personal. So…

Can you offer me some form of service that one or several others don’t already?

Do *I* really benefit from this service you offer?

How many slaves do I already have? How many do I want?

Does your idea of personal servitude match mine?

We KNOW I’ll be making your life better, how are you going to enrich mine?

Asking right from the beginning to be my sex slave is going to generate genuine disgust no matter what you look like. It’s just insulting on so many levels.

Are you a one trick pony? Because this is servitude, not free sessions or bartering for the play you want. You don’t X so you can Y. You whatever the fuck I want so you can serve.

Is your availability going to work with when I would want you?

Are you a man or a mouse? I only like men (who I sometimes can make my mouse). Sniveling “worthless” slaves insult me when they ask for my collar because they’re really telling me that I’m worthless. I deserve better than worthless. That is not to say that humility doesn’t go a long way.

People asking to be a slave or referring to themselves as my slaves when I first meet them really turn me off. That’s like (seriously) asking a girl to marry you on the first date IMO. You are not my slave until I say you are. Keep referring to yourself as a/my slave and you’re going to confirm for me that you are a slave only to your own desires and not to any one woman in particular. We should really get to know each other first. My professional persona is only one small part of who I am as a woman, and it is the woman who collars you. The WHOLE woman. Thereby the whole woman has to like you. Sometimes that will take a long time, and sometimes it will happen in a surprisingly short time. It’s anyone’s guess how long that might take.­

So- I can only imagine that if someone wanted to successfully approach me for a relationship more than professional they might be polite, honest, and patient. They will have a well-rounded idea of me as a Pro and a woman from the information I put forth to the world, and they will keep my interests in mind above their own. What will be will be. Rush me or stalk me and you ruin every chance you might have had. And we might have been great.

I know this isn’t exactly a map to your dreams come true, but maybe enough lifestyle Pro’s will chime in to give you guys looking for something more something to go on.

Answer personally, because that’s all you can really do, but readers keep in mind that these thoughts, suggestions, and ideas are not the rule.

This entry was posted Wednesday, September 16th, 2009 at 9:15 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.